Perfectly Imperfect

Life. / Thursday, January 10th, 2019

Finding out you’re pregnant has the potential, as it should, to be one of the most exhilarating and special moments of a couples (or man, or woman’s) life… however, not long after you announce the news do you begin to feel overwhelmed, powerless, and emotionally exhausted (in some cases, in my case). Questions smacking you from every angle: how far along are you? Do you have a gender preference? Do you have names picked out? Are you excited? What are you craving? How are you feeling? Are you showing? Can I touch your belly? Can I SEE your belly? What does your husband say?

Sister… whoa… chill. Number one, I literally am trying to soak in the news and share these emotions with my family because I too just found out… and number two those questions are awfully personal this early on. Even if you are top of the line excited from the very moment you find out, you might want a little smidge of privacy, at least for a sec.

In my case it all happened very quickly. Found out, got excited, got bombarded with comments and advice and questions, got sick, got hospitalized, stayed sick for weeks, got bombarded with more of the same advice and comments and questions, started feeling better, more questions, then excitement again. Whirlwind of emotion, exhaustion physical and mental, pain, and worry. Family and my husband was the only way I muddled through… and it was taxing on everyone. Having such a strong support system was a game changer.

Thankfully after the struggle of being so sick ended, more than halfway through my pregnancy, I am able to enjoy what is to come, we are able to enjoy it. We can talk about it and plan and be excited about our future. In the beginning it was disappointing I wasnt excited or able to enjoy the moment. I felt so guilty for not being excited about something I always wanted. I thought I was a failure or a disappointment to mothers everywhere. I was comparing myself to everyone around me including what I saw on social media envying those who seemed to have it better. Those who could eat and sleep and continue living perfect (seemingly, perfect) lives. Fortunately I caught myself before I slipped in too deep and realized everything has a purpose and mine is this and now. Be patient, be strong, be brave and push forward knowing that something better lies on the other side.

There’s always a light and God always paves a path for the good and well being of those who love and praise Him. It’s important to remember that no matter the circumstance you are strong and everyone experiences life differently. What matters is you do what’s best for yourself and your family, despite the odds, despite what anyone else says. ♥



2 Replies to “Perfectly Imperfect”

  1. Exactly what I needed to hear for myself. Just found out I’m pregnant as well. And I’m so miserable with being sick and widespread pain. Its been rough and I’m not yet excited just getting through the day is hard enough and having no sleep doesnt help. Hoping my second trimester will be better for me. Congratulations to you and husband. Have a happy and healthy rest of your pregnancy. XO

    1. Thank you and congratulations to you!! Things will get better, they always do, just think about the outcome. It will all be worth it. 🖤 & for me, feeling better happened in my second trimester so hang in there!

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